Tara and Dan August Date

We were very fortunate in August to have a long weekend away, full of dates, in PA, MD and NJ!

First, we drove with our two kids from our home in PA to Baltimore's Inner Harbor and met up with a friend who was going to be watching our kids for the weekend at her home in Maryland. We all had lunch together and then hung out in the harbor a little before she left with the kids and we checked into our hotel (which I had Pricelined at the last minute and got an awesome deal--love Priceline!!).

Friday night we had a drink at one place in the harbor, I went for a pedicure while Dan hung out in the harbor, and then we went for Japanese at another place in the harbor. :) Afterwards we sat by the water watching boats and people, I bought some sunglasses and Dan smoked a cigar, and then we ended up having an early night, thanks to the "Saki  Bomb" Dan had with his dinner at the Japanese place. LOL.

Saturday we spent some time looking at a boat of the type we were considering getting then drove to the marina where we have our current boat, about 1.5 hours away from Baltimore. That day we spent the day on the water, boating to a place on the Chesapeake that we had never been before. Normally we are trying to manage a 3 and 5 year old on the boat (which mostly means breaking up fights and getting them snacks) so it was very relaxing to just chill out on the water alone.

Saturday night we drove back home to PA...another 1.5 hours.

Sunday morning we left for NJ, 2 hours away, to have lunch with a client and his wife and then afterwards went to Dan's cousin's wedding, also in NJ. Ending the date weekend with a wedding was lovely!

Monday we worked all day and then drove another 1.5 hours to the halfway point to pick up our kids and another 1.5 hours back home. It was a LOT of driving for one weekend, but we were together and really had a great time.

Tara and Dan July Dates

We had TWO dates this month!

The first was a planned date, babysitter and everything. We went out for dinner to a restaurant with indoor/outdoor seating. We ate indoors and then had a drink outdoors. A plain ol' dinner date, but nice to get away and spend time talking and people watching.

Our second date was not planned and was a breakfast date. We dropped the kids off day camp and then decided to grab some breakfast at Dunkin' Donuts. Then made a trip to Lowe's to get some counter-top samples for the kitchen and look at ovens. Sounds boring! But it was my favorite of the two dates. :) I think because it wasn't planned and we just blew off work we were supposed to be doing at home.

Dan and Tara: May Date

We went to the Outer Banks last week with some good friends, a tradition we started several years ago. The several friends we went with had 6 "older" kids between them (ages 12 - 20). So we really had plenty o' time to ourselves while the kids occupied our 3 and 4 year olds in the pool, with games, in the movie room, etc. We even had plenty of help at nap time which was awesome!

But we did go out on a date one night, to the same restaurant we always go to in Duck, NC. It was delicious as usual (well, last year wasn't delicious because I tried soft shell crabs on a whim...YUCK..never again). Then we went to another restaurant and tried to get a drink at their outside, bay front bar. We sat there for 15 minutes and weren't acknowledged once by the bartender! It was so weird.

So we left, bought a bottle of wine elsewhere, and sat on the beach to drink it until the sun went down, which was WAY better than the bar anyway! I'm sure that will now be part of the tradition in years to come.

Dan and Tara: April Date

So in March, we had no date. Sad to say. It passed with no time to ourselves, boo hoo.

This past Saturday we realized we had no evening plans and a mother (mine) we could visit to ask to watch the kids for our last ditch April date! Score!

We went out for Thai food. To a small town around here that has just about every type of restaurant food you'd want. We tried Thai, I hope to try more restaurants in the future. Our food was delicious.

 Half way through our evening I remembered our neighborhood friends were also on a date night that evening so Dan texted them. Lo and behold they were a few doors down from us so we planned to meet at a bar for drinks! Good times!

Before our friends arrived I snagged a trivia sheet from the bar and made Dan cooperate with me for quiz time. I learned he gives up pretty easily if he doesn't get the answer right the first time. :/ I also learned my horoscope for the month was to consider professional help for the goals I hope to achieve. Hmm.....Dan and I both agreed that professional help might be in the form of an interior decorator. Would that be nice?!

 That's as exciting as it gets for us here. Next month's date will be out of state and I hope it will be more exciting!! :)

Our February "Not Really A Date"

We don't technically have our February date for another week and a half, but since yesterday was Valentine's Day and we spent 12 straight hours kid free and together for work I thought I'd write about that as our February date. It ended up being such a special and inspiring day that I wanted to share it.

We had a client meeting in Northern New Jersey, about 2.5 hours away from where we live so we dropped the kids at Grammie and Papa's house and drove to the meeting. Our client is J and his wife is L. They are both 55 years old. This was our first time meeting them in person, even though we have been doing work for J for several months (we have a web marketing company, he has a home improvement business).

After we all went for lunch, Dan met with J in their home office and I sat and talked with L in the living room for about 2 hours. L is permanently disabled and disfigured from a disease that in the beginning of it (about 15 years ago) left her completely bedridden, in her second story apartment, for two years. Over the years she has been told a number of times she only had a short time to live.

A year into her 2 year bedridden state, J came to visit her at her house (they had gone to high school together, but weren't connected after that. He had heard about her and her illness and wanted to visit). After 4 straight nights of visiting her, he found a way to get her out of the house and drove her around town so she could feel the wind in her hair. He did that for several nights in a row. Two weeks later he proposed to her. She was stunned and after she improved and was no longer bedridden, they got married.

Two things really struck me about this couple and these two things just made for a surprisingly beautiful Valentine's Day.

The first was that she has the most amazingly positive attitude. I have never met anyone like her. She's a "Jersey Girl" at heart, although her disease has ravaged her body and she looks much older than her 55 years. But she is the kind of person that after spending just 30 minutes with her, you just truly do not see her disability or disfigurement and she really is beautiful. She has NO complaints, even though she is in constant pain. She feels NO sadness for herself, even though it's very hard for her to walk and do other daily things. She feels SO much love for so many people and talks about everyone as if they hung the moon. She even gave so much grace to the nurse, who during one of her recent surgeries threw away the bones (!!!) that her doctor was supposed to be putting back into her finger after he removed them to do some work. (Sorry if that was TMI!). While I was there she got a phone call from a veterinarian that she has never even met and, to make a long story short, offered to pay for someone's vet bill if they can't afford it--all the Dr. needs to do is call her. She is just that kind of person. (She wasn't scammed...she contacted the vet first).

Ok so that's the first thing--I was just so unexpectedly inspired by this beautifully fragile, yet strong, human being who has so little in terms of physical ability, yet is thankful for so much.

The second thing that struck me, and is the main reason I wanted to post this as our date, is about the love that J has for L. He outright pursued and chose her when she was unable to even move in bed. She couldn't do a thing for him and he, at that time, had to do everything for her. And now, everything he does, is still for her. He works only so he can provide for her and make her happy. Every word that comes out of his mouth about her is praise for her. Not in a sickening way, because really, she is that wonderful. But he just LOVES her with generosity, humility and true selflessness. And honestly...looking at him, and even hearing him talk about other things, you wouldn't expect it. He is a Jersey Guy, right down to a diamond stud in each ear. :) I really wish I had heard his side of the story about why and how he chose her, but maybe some day.

L credits J with a lot of her recovery and current stability. Her doctors say she is in a state of remission and hasn't gotten any worse in recent years and some things have gotten better. Dan and I had a lot to talk about during our drive back to PA from NJ last night. We both learned a lot. I think True Love helped her heal and it's so inspiring to see what they are doing for each other--and many other people-- through the simple testimony of their life lived with so much gratitude.

(Our next date will be less serious.....I promise). :)

Our January Date-Tara and Dan

We went on our January date this past weekend and it was actually a weekend long date.

For the past 8 years we have been going to a place in rural southwestern Pennsylvania, a property owned by a very nice family that rents out their 4 cabins on 75 acres. The cabins are not rustic (other than being in the middle of nowhere). They have water, electricity, heat, cute decor, and hot tubs. Our anniversary is the end of December so for the past few years we have been going to one of the cabins (we've tried all 4 now) in January to celebrate our anniversary. But it's equally wonderful to go there in the spring, summer, or fall, which we have also done. This year we were there celebrating our 11th anniversary.

This was on a telephone pole out front of the cabin.

So we left the kids with a wonderful family friend, packed up our two labs and spent two nights in solitude! We ate dinner, drank wine, read (I finished The Hunger Games and started The Help), put (most of) a puzzle together, spent time in the hot tub, went for a walk and even watched our crazy dogs take a swim in the icy creek (it was very cold out and the creek banks were filled with icicles--the dogs didn't care).

Gretchen's mad dash.

Two old barns behind the cabin.

It was not a weekend of "reconnecting" so much as relaxing together, which is just what we needed due to our very busy schedule lately. In years past, there have been some great weekends of really reconnecting, but this year was not one of the years we needed it as much. Hope that makes sense. But we did try some of the questions from Amber's list. Dan wasn't a huge fan of it and got kind of silly with his answers. Typical. ;) But we did have a fun time picking and choosing some of them.

We did agree on the answer to one question. The question was about what we'd like to go back to from when we were dating and we agreed nothing. We love that we get to spend every day together now and don't wish to not do that, as was the case when we were dating. :)

How We Met: Tara and Dan

Dan and I actually met in High School, where he was in the class above me. I didn't know him well, I knew his younger sister better. In fact, he knew my twin sister much better. He was her first date and first kiss at age 14. Their relationship didn't last long. :)

Fast forward 12 years, age 26 (28 for Dan). I hadn't talked to Dan very much at all since high school other than maybe in college a few times because he was friends with someone I hitched a ride home with on weekends once in a while. In December of 1997 we were at a mutual friend's Christmas party and caught up and chatted a bit. I remember thinking he was very nice, but that's about it. (Oh, I also thought he looked like a lumberjack...flannel shirt and full red beard, ha ha!).

Fast forward again, 5 months later, May of 1998 and I was preparing to move from Pennsylvania to Atlanta for a job. The night before I moved I was out with this same mutual friend of ours who said we should go say goodbye to Dan before I left. I was like "Huh?? I don't talk to Dan.....haven't seen him since December at your party and before that probably the early 90's!" But..I agreed because I was sick and needed tissues and had a full bladder and needed to pee. Ha!

It was midnight and we woke him up. :/ We visited for a bit, I used his bathroom and his tissues and we were on our way.

Within the next couple of days he had emailed me. The details are sketchy, but apparently he had wanted to get in touch with me and never had after that party in December. So we emailed for a long time, at least a year, just as friends. We got closer and closer through email, phone and instant messaging. There were a number of obstacles to actually forming a romantic relationship, the distance between us being just one of them, but we saw each other a few times during that year when I would visit home and it became clear we were becoming more than friends. After about a year he made his first visit in Atlanta. Emails, calls, and visits back and forth continued for another year.

In May of 2000 he helped me move back to Pennsylvania and 2 weeks after that we got engaged. 6 months later, we were married!

We've been happily married 11 years now, have a 4 year old son and 3 year old daughter.